Promotional artwork for my fantasy rom-com screenplay Venus & Vitalis.

A hilarious, outrageous war between the sexes in Hollywood.
The film your mother told you not to watch.


Log line:
In this unique rom-com a Hollywood cinematographer is kidnapped by a sex crazed Helen of Troy, a math professor Chippendales dancer and the Egyptian cat goddess Bastet, to be their love slaves, using ambrosia to spiritually uplift humanity and create immortality and utopia.


Cut lines:

  • In Hollywood, sex is a religion.
  • In heaven the sex is great, cats water ski and you live forever.
  • A comedy that leaves no sacred cows unmilked.




Synopsis


Venus, the goddess of love, stands before the pyramids of Egypt. On her iPhone, she gazes at images of the love of her life, a famous Hollywood cinematographer named Vitalis.

Venus enters the pyramid's great chamber and walks past the mummies and statues. At the altar is a huge sarcophagus of Bastet, the Egyptian cat goddess.

Standing above a cat mummy, Venus cuts ambrosia fruit and uses it to bring the cat mummy Bastet to life. The reincarnated cat is overjoyed to be reunited with Venus and they fly back to Los Angeles.

Back in Hollywood, cinematographer Vitalis has been dating the most beautiful stars in Hollywood, but still can't figure out why he keeps getting dumped. So he visits his long time therapist Venus for love advice, she being the most renowned intimacy coach in Hollyweird.

But Venus's dating advice is unconventional, to say the least. And much to his surprise, after twenty years of counseling, Venus seduces Vitalis.

But now Vitalis is troubled, since every year he grows older, while the immortal Venus is youthful forever.

That night Venus, Vitalis and her cat Karma attend an awards ceremony at the Dolby Theater, where he is a nominee for best cinematography. But on the red carpet they encounter Vitalis's ex-girlfriend Felicity, a flamboyant Hollywood superstar who had dumped him just the previous week.

Ex-girlfriend Felicity is accompanied by her new beau, Chippendales dancer (and calculus professor) Dr. Transcendence Rabinowitz.

Felicity is a snarky, sexy Hollywood hedonist and as she tries to seduce the beautiful Venus, the two women throw witty, acerbic barbs at one another.

Transcendence and Felicity then kidnap Venus and Vitalis to be their love slaves, in Felicity's Masonic temple "red room", across the street from the Hollywood Boulevard awards ceremony.

As the temple iron gates clang shut behind them, the now imprisoned Venus and Vitalis realize that they aren't in Kansas anymore.

But Vitalis is overjoyed to be reunited with his reincarnated childhood cat Bastet, who had been secretly resurrected in the Egyptian pyramid the previous week.

Love triangles ensue when Venus and Vitalis are joined by a jail bait calculus student, her geeky engineer boyfriend and a sexy Amazonian Navy SEAL commander.

Inside the temple, the most outrageous hijinks occur, water skiing cats, show tune sing-alongs, Navy SEAL invasions and naked bungee jumping.

Vitalis is torn between his blossoming love for Venus, while still pining for his nymphomaniac ex-girlfriend Felicity.

Venus offers immortality to all mankind, if Vitalis can prove that his love for her is true.

The meaning of love versus sex is explored and with the help of ambrosia (and Broadway show tunes), everyone lives happily ever after, forever.

In Hollywood, sex is a religion.



Mood board
https://michaelkarp.net/venusMood.htm

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Pitch PDF

michaelkarpvfx@gmail.com
+ 1 (514) 562-8147
https://www.imdb.com/name/nm0439935/