December 03, 2005

The one thing women love but men hate

Hey guys,

In case you haven't figured it out, men and women have different ways of looking at the world. This can often lead to a heck of a lot of frustration on the part of guys because they just can't "understand women."
Above all else, though, there's one thing that men just can't stand, but women love--and when you fully grasp it, you'll be able to understand how women see the world, and be able to create attraction with any woman you choose, literally on demand.
 
Here it is: uncertainty. Think about that for a minute. As men, we can't stand uncertainty. We hate wondering if she "likes us," we just want to know. We hate wondering if we're going to "get lucky," we just want to know. We hate waiting for her to call, we'd just prefer her to call when we want her to.

So what do we do? We presume that, because we don't like uncertainty, women don't either. And that's where the trouble starts. Why? Because women LOVE uncertainty. It creates attraction for them. So when you tell her you "like her" all the uncertainty goes away, and the attraction dissipates. If you call her all the time, it kills the uncertainty, and the attraction.

If you pick and read any romance novel, you'll see it's all about uncertainty, even right up to the end. These are written by women for women, and provide an "uncertainty fix."
How is this useful to us? Pretty simple, actually. Instead of worrying about telling her you like her, make her wonder if you like her. Instead of calling her all the time, call her sporadically. Touch her in a way that makes her think you're attracted to her... but stop suddenly, only to start again when she least expects this.

This does two things: it creates uncertainty for her, and shuts up the whiney voice in your head that keeps asking, "does she like me?" Because you're the one creating uncertainty, you're the one in control of the interaction, the one defining authority, which is what women crave (see http://www.effortlesscommunication.com/enter.htm for more details on how to do this).

And when you know how to give a woman what she craves, you'll suddenly have a different problem than you have now... "so many girls, and so little time," as the old Keel song goes.

On with the fun....

-John Alanis